I'm clearly not living the life that I planned to live. As I talk to more women, I learn that a lot of us aren't on the life track we thought we'd be on. It's not that we don't eventually arrive at our desired destination; rather the path taken to get there wasn't anticipated. My goal in writing this post is to offer the unmarried person some godly perspective.
I know how hard it is to be single because I'm single. I've had bushels of boyfriends and first dates and what remains are some pleasant memories of the good times and some cringe worthy moments of the bad. I lost my mother and pleaded with God to send me a physical being to comfort me. He decided to answer "No, for now." I embarked on a five year journey that encompassed reading dating self help books, joining multiple dating websites and researching various personal improvement topics. I delved into my faith with gusto and began to pray earnestly. At first the prayer was for a mate, then for friends, and then I started praying for a mate again; finally it was for "they will be done". Learning to pray "thy will be done" has been life altering. With that statement comes a peace that lingers long after the prayer has been said.
Has the pain gone away when I find out a friend is pregnant or another is engaged? Have I stopped asking myself when it will be my turn? It hasn't stopped. I'm coming to learn that we all have feelings and we can't help how we feel and we really can't control our reaction. Our feelings will control how we react.
It seems hopeless right? I have days when I think it is. Then I remember the things I've learned. The sweet things and memories of a beautiful life come back to me. If I could, I'd ask you to close your eyes and visualize my life.
I grew up safe and protected. My mother infused in me her love and Christ's. I felt loved at the molecular level. My childhood was poignant and innocent. My mother strived to captivate my imagination and carry me off to endless possibilities as we played. I smiled as I wrote that.
My career started off a jumbled mess and I hated every minute of the first 5 years of it! I dispaired of work and wanted, more desperately than before, to find a spouse and have my babies. That didn't happen! What happened is even more incredible. During my paralegal studies I was given a list of legal recruiters. I scanned the list and promptly discarded it. I had, had some bad experiences with recruiters in the past and had vowed never to use them again. I applied for a legal position in the newspaper and discovered it was from a recruiter listed on that list. I almost didn't take the interview but figured if the school recommended the agency than it was worth taking a chance and wasting some time off. Accepting that interview was life changing! It put me face to face with a very talented woman who had an eye for recognizing talent. She immediately promised she'd find me a job and she did! Within weeks I had 3 interviews and successfully was made 2 offers. One of them is where I'm working now. I interviewed for a legal secretary position but was offered something in HR instead. This job has changed my life! It's here that I've learned to grow, accept positive and negative feedback and rely on my own talent to get me through. I'm blessed by God to be where I am.
What I'm trying to say is that the scripture that says all things work together for the good is quite true. They not only work together for the good but what is prepared by God ends up being the perfect match for what we desire and need. That type of genius orchestration can take years of a master chess player (God), moving pieces around before something amazing comes into play. Nevertheless, God has had plans for you and me since before we were born. We must never doubt Providence. It all works out and it works out so brilliantly. Think of the story of Joseph. One of my favorite scriptures is when Joseph says "What was meant for evil, God meant for good." So true! This is the same for your life, dear reader. The Lord is never late. Trust Him to accomplish what you ask and in the interim focus on bearing fruit for Him and finding your place. Life isn't a dress rehearsal. We all only get to live 1 day at a time.
Additional Resources: Single In Christ: A Name Better Than Sons And Daughters, What I've Learned Since I Kissed Dating Goodbye, All Things For Good, Part 2
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment